Leaning Into My Witch
Intentions are Everything
Hey lovely readers, in my previous blog post, 2023! What a year! What about 2024? I talked about my writing plans for the year, and also my personal plans. The latter included taking time out to enjoy the wonderful place I live in the Algarve in Portugal, to indulge in a spot of gardening –one of my great pleasures and a lovely way to relax, and I also talked about leaning into my witchy side. There's a reason I write about witches!
When I published the first books in the White Haven Witches series, back in 2018/2019, I was asked a few times as to whether I was a practising witch, and my reply was no. My reason for that was that I don't spell cast as such, or belong to a coven - not that you need to, obviously. However, as the years have passed, and I have reflected, written, and read more about witchcraft, the more it feels true to say that yes, I am a witch.
As those of us who practise the craft know, it's not just about what we do. It's also a way of being and thinking. Certainly witchcraft takes many forms. There is no right way, that is the beautiful thing about it, and we all find our own authentic route. For me, my belief in witchcraft and magic began in my late teens when I started to question all the established rules and belief systems. I already distrusted organised religion. I disliked the fact that the only God talked about was male, and that he led a patriarchal system of worship and behaviour that didn't resonate with me at all. There were so many rules, and none of them allowed for freedom of expression. Paganism, however, did speak to me.
I began to read around the subject, and I had a few friends who had the same opinions. I looked at how the church had appropriated pagan celebrations, supplanting new beliefs on top of old ones. The more I read, the more annoyed I became. The old ways called to me. I found the Christian church controlling and misogynistic, and to be honest, deeply disturbing. However, I'm not here to bash religion. It serves some people well. Just not me. Following the natural rhythms of the seasons and the cycle of the moon felt a far truer way of living.
At eighteen I was also, in line with my thoughts on life, becoming more unconventional. I threw off accepted ways of dressing and behaving, because I felt more authentically me. I dyed my hair, first with henna, and then with orange and later pink hair dye. I wore beads in my hair, and let it turn into dreadlocks. I embraced hippie dresses, and then grunge. In the late eighties and early nineties, listening to grunge music was where I truly found myself and where my individuality came to the fore. I wrote a blog called About a girl -and what Chris Cornell means to me, triggered by his untimely death, where I talk about this in more detail. I have always bucked convention. I have never got married, and never had kids. Witches do, obviously, just not me. It has never been necessary, and fortunately my partner agrees!
So, witchcraft.
Well, I loved reading about strong, magical women, such as Circe and Medea. I fell in love with the Mists of Avalon by Marion Zimmer Bradley. Who didn't? I adored Moonheart by Charles de Lint. The veils between worlds always felt tangible. I admired the strong, independent women around me. My friend Cecilia - I have lost touch with her years ago - was amazing. I think all unconventional women have a touch of the witch. It's their fierce independence that marks them as such. I think it marks me, too. We had a fire in the house I shared with three other female friends once. No one was hurt fortunately, but the attic bedroom was badly damaged. My friend who slept there had to sleep in our bedrooms while it was fixed. She was on nights at the time (a nurse like me), so it worked well. However, she declared that she couldn't sleep in my room. She said something I thought peculiar at the time, but that has always stuck with me. She said my bedroom was too full of me. I took that to mean that I had a strong presence. Maybe I'm wrong.
I also went with a group of friends to a tarot reading. The second I sat down in the chair for mine, the woman doing the reading told me that I was on the wrong side of the table. I never mentioned this to anyone, but not long after that I was gifted a set of tarot cards by a friend who spoke of things I had barely begun to grasp, and I started to learn the craft. We had long conversations he and I. That period of my life was particularly intense. It felt as if I was at the cusp of something... It felt as if I was really finding out who I was. This was compounded by books I was reading, and conversations I was having. And then my explorations were put on hold by life.
However, those beliefs have been with me constantly. I am drawn to the mysteries of life. I remain deeply intuitive. I sense ghosts. I always follow my gut instincts, and they have always served me correctly. I know what some people are thinking before they even say it. I am often told I'm wise. I'm not sure I am, but it's a nice compliment! I was called a witch once by a male friend who was frustrated with me. He thought he was being insulting. He wasn't. I was also often told how kind I am. I never saw that, because it came naturally to me, but I do now. Kindness is underrated, but so important. We should always be kind to each other. These qualities find expression in my writing. I am very creative. I love playing with colour and images, and of course, words. Quite honestly, although I was a nurse for years, particularly in mental health nursing where my intuitiveness proved useful, writing is my happy place. It's my home.
Witchcraft and Writing
About fifteen years ago I felt the need to start writing properly. I had always kept diaries. I had to write. But more and more I felt the need to write stories, much as I had done in my teens during English classes. I embarked on an English Literature degree and did lots of Expressive Arts papers. The second paper I took was on Witchcraft and Magic. It was serendipitous. It plunged me right back into the thought processes I had started all those years before. It helped me focus. I had ideas I needed to express.
I also returned to the old stories I had always loved. The old myths and legends. That was why I chose to retell the Arthurian tales. I also knew I wanted to set them in the Otherworld. I have to write about the paranormal. I can't help it. It's hard wired into me. I found that writing about Morgan le Fay, Nimue, and the Lady of the Lake was the most fun part of the those tales. When I started writing the White Haven Witches, it was natural to progress those ideas.
However, it was also important to keep the witchcraft I wrote about grounded. Why invent new magic systems when there was one right there to draw on? I love research, so I delved into witchcraft, and built on my knowledge, and found I respected witchcraft all the more. But I still didn't consider myself a witch, although I read the tarot, and now own several packs. I only ever do a reading though, with the set given to me years ago. There's something magical about lighting candles and incense and shuffling and laying out the cards. They have never lied, and have given me great insight into situations. It's easy to write about Avery and her use of them. The opening scene of Buried Magic came to me immediately. I'm also drawn to the moon, particularly full moons. I'm a Cancerian. It rules me. The moon is part of who I am.
And now?
Over the last few months, I've felt closer to how I was in my early twenties than I have for the last thirty years. Is this a menopause thing? I don't know. I like my younger me. She was bold and fearless, and frankly, had boundless energy that I no longer have. But I retain her curiosity, and her sense of mystery. The feeling that there is something beyond that which we cannot see or hear, but is just there. A pulse in the dark. A stirring in the earth. The watcher in the moon. A breath on the wind. Witchcraft to me is very natural. It's a feeling of being at one with the rhythms of the earth. The ebb and flow of the seasons. The cycle of the moon.
Witchcraft and the deeper mysteries of the world have always walked alongside me, and are part of me. I have rituals I follow every day - beyond the daily coffee and copious tea every morning while writing! I light candles and incense to influence my mood, and set my intentions for the day. I honour the moon every month. I soak up the sun. I speak to plants. I say final words over dead mice and birds that the cats have brought in. In the last year I have once again sought to connect myself even closer with the craft. I don't know why I should feel that urge now, but things that I have put aside cannot be put aside for any longer. Maybe it's because I read so much about witchcraft, but then again, I have for years. Does that mean I am now fervently spellcasting? No. But I am doubling down on my intentions. I am focussing more on rituals for new moon and full moons, and the Wheel of the Year. After all, all of my witch books are based around the seasonal celebrations. That was a deliberate, but also a natural choice.
Of course, hand in hand with witchcraft, for me, are the myths, legends, and folklore that shape our world. I have always been fascinated by these too. Again, it's another reason I weave them into my stories. England is soaked in them.
However, more than that, being a witch, for me, is about how I feel and express myself. I rage against patriarchy, and outmoded religions and ways of thinking that prove detrimental to women, I align more and more with feminist readings. I love Hagitude by Sharon Blackie. If you haven't read it, I highly recommend it. She talks about menopause burning away extraneous ways of being until we find our core. I can relate to that! She is also an expert on the myths that shape us. I've subscribed to her Substack, The Art of Enchantment.
As a consequence of these changes, or should I say, a return and strengthening of earlier behaviours, the way I write about witchcraft is different to how I used to. I keep the White Haven Witches grounded - reasonably, and will continue to do that. I wanted - and want- them to be normal people who happen to be witches, like all of us. I approach them with a light touch.
However, I feel different about the Moonfell Witches. They have more weight to them. Their history clings to them. They carry more of the mysteries of life. Their ancestors are close. Barak, one of the White Haven Hunters, describes them in my latest book as always keeping one foot in the past. That is why in that series I will look at their past and present. It will be fun for me, and you, I hope! I cannot write cosy witchcraft. I don't want to. Witchcraft is not cosy. Not to me at least. It is deep and mysterious, and unfathomable, and wondrous, with roots that reach deep into the earth, and draw on the elements that are all around us.
Therefore, this year will be one in which I become more intentional with my practice. Intention, after all, is everything to witchcraft. I'm excited about it. I'm fired up to practice and to learn. In addition to my numerous books on the subject, and there will be more, I'm listening to podcasts, and subscribing to groups. I'll list a few of these below, and I'd love you to share any recommendations you might have.
I also announced a few weeks ago that I will be sharing more resources with my Ream subscribers. Wheel of the Year resources will be available, as well as information on the myths and legends relevant to all of my books, not just the witches series. I also promised more short stories too. I'm very excited about all of it!
Resources:
Hagitude by Sharon Blackie I plan on reading her other books too.
The Art of Enchantment, Sharon Blackie's Substack and her wonderful website with her courses.
The Three Ravens Podcast
Honey and the Hex Podcast
The Middle-Aged Witch Podcast
A Pinch of Magick Podcast
Modern Witchcraft: Guide to the Wheel of the Year Book
There are a few more podcasts I've subscribed to, but haven't really started listening to yet. If you have some to recommend, please list them in the comments below. I'd also love to hear your thoughts on my post, and your own experiences with witchcraft. Also please share your suggestions as to what you'd like to see in my Ream subscription.
Thanks for reading about my personal journey. More blogs coming soon x
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